Mad World
by OddObsessed
Summary: Can't really describe this story. There'd be no story then. Sort of OOC, but Aelita was pretty quiet once she was virtualized. Oneshot songfic, song is 'Mad World' by Gary Jules


**Wow, I wrote a story with pretty much NO pairings at all! weird. Anyway... I disclaim all I need to disclaim. Song is 'Mad World' by Gary Jules.**

**This is done by Aelita's point of view.**

* * *

Nobody noticed me. Who would? I was just another person in this wide world, with nothing special. Sure, my hair was naturally pink. But that was the only thing that separated me from the rest.  
They all looked the same. One after another. They were all identical. All in the same suits, with the same grim, sometimes tired expressions. No wonder I felt depressed.

_All around me are familiar faces,  
Worn out places, worn out faces._

It was only six in the morning, and already there were crowds, racing to get to work. You'd had thought someone would've noticed a 15 year old girl sitting on the curb at six. But no, nobody noticed.

_Bright and early for their daily races.  
Going nowhere, going nowhere._

_So this is what I'd wanted for so long. A real life. Is this really what I'd been expecting? _I thought our group was more than just an army against Xana, but no. We spilt up afterwards. It started when Ulrich finally got the courage to ask Yumi out.  
Turns out he waited a little too long.  
He went into a deep depression, and Yumi ended up hanging out with her own grade. Odd tried to help, but just got turned away. He ended up with new friends.  
Nobody else tried to help. Nobody else has been the same since.

_Their tears are filling up their glasses.  
No expression, no expression.  
_

Jeremie and I didn't work out. I still don't know why. I thought about Odd. Oh I sure did. But apart from being my 'cousin', I didn't feel that way about him.  
Jeremie actually had a few girls since, but they didn't work out either.

_Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow.  
No tomorrow, no tomorrow._

I let out a shaky sigh and stood up, hiding my face from the crowd. I wanted to be in the real world because I knew I'd have _friends. _Someone to lean on when I needed them. But I haven't had a real friend since.

_And I find it kind of funny,  
I find it kind of sad.  
The dreams in which I'm dying,  
Are the best I've ever had._

Suddenly I didn't want to live anymore. I couldn't kill myself though. The rest of the group are upset enough with life. I couldn't add more to their plate.  
I'd just add more to mine.  
I mean, I didn't have a reason to stay here anymore. Nobody noticed me.  
Actually, nobody ever did.

_I find it hard to tell you,  
I find it hard to take.  
When people run in circles,  
It's a very, very mad world. Mad world._

I did try to tell people that I wasn't happy here. But they had other things to do. Things that didn't involve me.  
My eyes still fill with tears when I see other kids run to their parents.  
It's not like I'm jealous. I just know that I'll never have a place in this world. I never did.  
And I never will.

_Children waiting for the day they feel good.  
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday._

I don't think I've been invited to anything with my old friends. We haven't done anything together for at least a year now. And yes, it does hurt.  
You know, I've never cut my wrists or anything. I'm not the type of depressed person who shows off. I don't think anybody actually knows I'm depressed with my life.

_Made to feel the way that every child should.  
Sit and listen, sit and listen._

I stopped and stared at the people who were busily trying to get to the office on time. Nobody was smiling. This wasn't the world that every child dreamed of.  
Not me, at least.

_Went to school and I was very nervous.  
__No one knew me, no one knew me._

I don't think even the teachers noticed I wasn't eating. Why would they?  
I wonder what does happen when you die. Do you go into an endless deep sleep? Is there a heaven? Do you turn into a ghost? Are you forever wandering the earth?  
Are you as invisible as I feel?

_Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson?  
Look right through me, look right through me._

Cold. The world is cold.  
That's my conclusion to this story. It's not over though. Not yet.  
I don't remember having a good night's sleep. What does it feel like to wake up, completely relaxed?  
I'd rather know what it felt like to be acknowledged. To be noticed.

_And I find it kind of funny.  
I find it kind of sad.  
The dreams in which I'm dying,  
Are the best I've ever had._

And yes, I've considered turning the super computer on. Releasing Xana. But like I said, why put more pressure on everyone else?  
I'm sure they're happier like this. Really.

_I find it hard to tell you,  
I find it hard to take.  
When people run in circles,  
It's a very, very mad world… Mad world._

I never fit in. Really, I didn't. I wasn't supposed to. If I was meant to fit in, I would've lived here my whole life.  
Yes, I feel like an alien. Like my textbook is completely different to everyone else's.  
But nobody's noticed. Not yet.  
They probably never will.

* * *

**So, please review etc etc. I was thinking of doing a sequel, where Aelita _does _find her place in the world. But really, that'd kill the impact. **


End file.
